Time For Me To Fly
by MRACR
Summary: Not a oneshot. Fax. Fang's helped Max through a hard time, but now she's back up and running and they're stuck inbetween friends and lovers. When Max's indecision and taking-for-granted pushes Fang to leave, can she realize her mistakes? Will he come back
1. Time For Me To Fly

**_Hey there all! And here's another oneshot from the mind of M--_**

**_Excuse me? Oneshot?_**

**_It's not a oneshot, then, self?_**

**_Uh, NO._**

**_Oh, sorry, I thought it was. That's all I--we ever do anymore._**

**_Don't talk like that!_**

**_Sorry..._**

**_Anyway it's not a oneshot. It's going to have at least three chapters. This is just the first. So hah._**

**_Um, ok people. So, I guess this isn't a oneshot. But it IS a songfic. So here's the first chapter and first song right here. REVIEW! (p.s. it's in Fang's POV)_**

* * *

Time For Me To Fly

****

I looked around at the flock, sleeping in the predawn light that filtered through the trees. I felt a bit guilty about this, since it wasn't their fault. But this was something I needed to do.

Then I looked at Max, feeling, as always, the sudden tenderness that overcame me in her presence, especially when she was sleeping or otherwise vulnerable. But this was something I needed to do. It was her, I couldn't let her keep doing this to me; I couldn't let her keep me here.

Glancing around again at the rest of the flock, I fingered the note in my hand.

_I've been around for you  
I've been up and down for you  
But I just can't get any relief_

I hoped Max would get it, finally get it with this note. The rest of the flock knew, somehow, and probably expected this. But not Max.

I'd done everything for her. Everything in my power. It wasn't her fault she took me for granted—she had way too many issues that just wouldn't let her go. So I helped her, never stopping, and definitely never complaining. I'd do anything for Max, and for the good of the flock.

_I've swallowed my pride for you  
I've lived and lied for you_

For Max, I'd become someone else. I'd become everything she needed, everything she wanted. I held her long into the nights she battled Jeb for possession of her own brain. I let her vent to me, cry on me, yell at me. I took it all for her.

I let her because we couldn't let the flock see just how out of it their leader was. I let her live through me. I held her up.

_But you still make me feel like a thief  
You got me stealin' your love away  
'Cause you never give it_

But even when it was finally over—when Itex and the School were defeated, when Jeb was killed, giving Max freedom and closure—even then, she never said she loved me. We were just friends. Best friends, but nothing more.

She knew I was more than that to her, and her to me. But she wouldn't let anything come of it. After saving the world, she was just trying to heal, to start a new life, to be what she used to be, strong like she used to be.

I understood, and I waited. Once, I tried to kiss her.

We were alone while the flock was out doing whatever they decided to do. We were hardly alone anymore, and I got the feeling it was on purpose.

It was a repeat of that night three years ago when I tried to kiss her. She jumped up, though, before I even touched her. Ran to her room. I didn't hear crying, only pacing, so I left her alone.

After that, we never talked about it. I waited, and she ignored. We were still friends and I was there for her, and she still leaned on me when she needed it.

_Peeling the years away  
And we can't relive it_

But I couldn't just wait forever. The constant giving was wearing down on me. We were already 17. Who knew how long bird hybrids would last? So far, we'd lasted longer than any other hybrid—excluding tortoise-lady, the now-deceased Director.

The rest of the flock could even see how much I loved Max, and how much she ignored it.

Max was her old self again—she didn't need me to hold her up. She apparently didn't need me at all. I had to go out and do _something_ with what was left of my life. Something productive. My work here was done.

_I make you laugh  
And you make me cry_

The last three lines of the note—oh how accurate they were. Max was the only one who could make me feel so strongly about something—mostly about her—that I could be driven to tears.

And meanwhile she was finally over her tears, all because of me.

That was as it should be; her face was too beautiful to harbor tear marks. It deserved to be clean and free. And now it would be—free of me. Just as I would be free of her.

_I believe it's time for me to fly_

_It's for the best_, I assured myself as I tucked the note into Max's hands, forced myself to look away, and kicked Iggy in the boot just before taking a running leap into the sky, soaring away, probably forever.


	2. Far Away

**_Ok, people, thank you SO MUCH for reviewing! OMG I can't believe that I actually got so many. I usually get like none at first. Lol but this is awesome I got so many. I'm so glad you all like this. Ok, and also, I'm updating and it's only been like ONE DAY so you all better be really greatful to me and give me...more reviews! Lol. :):) I would really appreciate it. I know, I know, I'm getting greedy, but I really did update quickly, because I just suddenly found the perfect song and had to write the next chappie. Aren't you glad? And I seriously mean it, thank you for the reviews and the love of this fic!_**

**_And yeah, I know I could have used this song in a way that ended the entire fic, but I didn't want to end it that quickly. I also promised this would be at least a three-shot, so I didn't want to, like, break my promise to you and myself. Lol. I want to find a really perfect song to end this thing with. But enjoy this chapter! It's not as sad as the last one, definitely! And the next will be even happier, promise!_**

**_Oh, I can't believe I forgot to mention this in the last chappie, for those who haven't heard the songs. The last one was "Time For Me To Fly" by REO Speedwagon. This one is "Far Away" by Nickelback. I'm just guessing here, but I bet a lot more people on here will know Far Away than Time For Me To Fly. Lol, but I love both of them. Hm, actually, I can't remember if I mentioned what song it was in the last chap and I am too lazy to go look, so you may have gotten it twice. Oh who cares. Lol. I'm so weird. But it IS 3:30 am now, so that's understandable, right? lol._**

**_Ok, so enjoy, review, got it? And this is in Max's POV. (p.s. sorry for the huge Author's Note, but I'm really tired and rambly and random right now)_**

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Far Away

It only took me a moment to recognize it from the air.

_This time, this place_

I landed in the clearing, cautiously folding my wings. It was the same clearing where he left. _He. Fang._

_Misused, mistakes_

I was alone; I'd left the others at the house. Yeah, the house. We had one.

I should probably get you back up to date, but not much has happened. Fang left, I read his note. After the shock wore off, realization set in and I immediately tried to find him. He couldn't really think I didn't need him, could he?

He could. And it was my fault. I used him, leaned on him, took him for granted. I never thanked him, or told him how much that meant to me. Just tried to keep things status quo.

_Too long, too late_

I didn't even realize I loved him until it was too late—much too late. I might never have if he hadn't left that note. I'd waited too long to say it, to do anything. I pushed him away without thinking. I was so freaking _stupid._

_Who was I to make you wait?_

It wasn't Fang's fault, either. He tried to tell me, tried to kiss me even. He was always there for me. I just couldn't return the favor, could I? Nope, that's me, the great Max Ride, can't even muster up the courage to tell the boy who helped her through half her life of horrors that she loved him. Just forced him to wait; forced him to leave.

_Just one chance  
Just one breath  
Just in case there's just one left  
_

Yeah, I pretty much hated myself. My old self. But I'd changed in the three _years_ since he'd left. I got another house for the flock, so they wouldn't have to follow me as I searched everywhere for my right-hand man. They could try to lead some semblance of a normal life, like they truly deserved.

Because who knew how long we had left? It was honestly amazing us hybrids had lasted this long. They deserved to be normal. Fang deserved more than I ever gave him. That's why I needed to find him now, if it wasn't too late.

_'Cause you know, you know  
That I love you  
I have loved you all along_

Did he even know I loved him?

By now I was talking out loud. Maybe searching had driven me insane, but I'd long ago started talking to myself out loud. It helped drive away the sinking feelings and thoughts that this was all futile and Fang might be dead by now. That I might die any minute.

"Did he ever know I loved him?" I asked myself out loud as I sank to my knees. I'd come back to this spot a million times, who knows why. This was where it all started, where he left me the note. I still carried it with me.

"I loved him the entire time, and was just too much of an idiot to say it. Did he know, is that why he left? Or did he not know, and that's why he left?"

On one hand, I wished I could stop talking to myself. On the other, no one was around, so what the heck. And on a third hand, an imaginary one, I didn't want to stop because I knew I might go insane. And on a fourth one that I chose to ignore, I knew I might already be insane.

_And I miss you  
Been far away for far too long  
_

"Oh, Fang, I miss you. I bet he didn't count on that. He figured I didn't care, that I wouldn't miss him. But oh were you wrong. I miss you, so much."

I said this to myself over and over. Every time I came here. I told him I missed him, I loved him, but nothing came of it, obviously.

"It doesn't matter how far away you are, or how long it takes," I continued my ever-present monologue, "I will find you."

But my heart didn't seem to be behind the words anymore; they were barely a whisper, carried away by the breeze.

_I keep dreaming you'll be with me  
And you'll never go_

I dreamt of Fang so often. Every night. Every night that I slept, anyway. Always that he came back, that we were in love at long last, that he never left again and I never forced him too. Always a happy ending. Always breaking my heart.

_Stop breathing if  
I don't see you anymore  
On my knees, I'll ask_

"Oh God, what if I never see him again?" I asked myself, eyes closed, still on my knees, leaning against a tree.

"What if he's gone forever?" I never let myself think this, but I was ready to give up. "The flock's doing ok by themselves . . ." I knew where this was headed. Suicide. But could I suicide without knowing for certain Fang wasn't coming back?

_'Cause with you, I'd withstand  
All of hell to hold your hand  
I'd give it all  
I'd give for us  
Give anything but I won't give up  
_

_No._ Came a firm, insistent thought, rising up from the back of my mind, the part that was the old me, before the horrors (not the everyday ones, the newer version of the Jeb-related ones), before the searching, past the insanity. The original Max.

_No. I'm not giving up. Anything but that. I refuse._

_'Cause you know, _

_That I love you  
I have loved you all along  
And I miss you  
Been far away for far too long  
_

"No," I repeated out loud. "No, I might have been out of it for way too long, made him wait way too long, but I will find him and get him back. I love him, and that's never going to change. No matter what happens, I will find him and make him see that he broke through and let _me_ see . . ."

The spark faded but never completely stopped as I laid there against the tree. My mind was made up but it hadn't yet convinced my body. Maybe I'd just stay here until morning, then.

_I keep dreaming you'll be with me  
And you'll never go  
Stop breathing if  
I don't see you anymore_

I dreamed of him, of Fang. He came back. I was in the clearing and he came up behind me. I was asleep in my dream. Obviously, but you get what I mean. Fang came up behind me and put his jacket over me, 'cause I was shivering. It woke me up, though, and I turned, seeing him for the first time in three years.

It was a slightly different dream than I normally had of him. He knelt next to me and without a word just held me. We didn't say anything, I just hung there in that moment, in his embrace. It was so beautifully warm . . . and then he disappeared.

Then I woke up. In that moment I wanted to just die, to stop breathing, to go to the ultimate sleep, where maybe I could have the ultimate dream and never have Fang leave me again.

_I wanted  
I wanted you to stay  
_

But I didn't. I just sat up, pulled the jacket off my shoulders, and stretched. Dawn was just breaking. Time to leave again. The dream was gone, the dream-Fang was gone, and I had to head out. I'd gathered the last of my old self while I was here and I didn't need to let it drift away.

_'Cause I needed  
I need to hear you say  
_

I stood and stretched again, shivering a bit. I swung the jacket over my shoulders and a scent rose from it, triggering the rest of the dream that I hadn't known I'd forgotten.

_That I love you  
I have loved you all along  
And I forgive you  
For being away for far too long  
_

Fang, in my dream, hadn't been completely silent. He'd whispered to me in broken sentences all through the night until I woke up and ended the perfection of it all.

"I love you, Max."

"I still love you and always have. Never stop believing that."

"Don't beat yourself up over the past. We all make mistakes."

"I forgive you. Remember that."

"I forgive you. I forgave you before you ever did anything."

"You're back now, and everything will be ok."

Tears sprang to my eyes. His voice—it sounded so real. I wanted it to be real. Would it ever be? Would I find him? Would he forgive me, still love me? Did I even deserve it?

_So keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore_

The jacket was half-on, my wings half-extended, when I heard the footstep intrude on my thoughts.

_Oh, God. _I held my breath, waiting for something to happen. Whoever-it-was would have seen my wings by now.

If I spun fast I could catch them off-guard . . . but if it was a hunter and he had a gun and an itchy trigger-finger . . .

_What the heck,_ I thought. Getting shot couldn't be worse than living without Fang, now, could it?

So I spun, didn't get shot, and let out my breath all in a rush when I saw who it was.

Those of you who are smarter than me and noticed that I didn't have a jacket when I first came to the clearing know who it was, had been all along.

_Believe it_

Could it really be? I wasn't dreaming?

_Hold onto me, never let me go_

He smirked. I gaped.

_Hold onto me, never let me go_

"Thought you could leave without saying hello?" Fang asked.

_Hold onto me, never let me go_


	3. Never Meet Again

**_Woohooo finally I update! And here's the end of this threeshot random doodad. It had no point, and I still don't think it does. Just random songficness. It took me so long to update because it really took me this long just to find this entirely unsuitable song for this chapter. Oh well. Hopefully you review and like it no matter how it turned out! ;) Never Meet Again by...dang, forgot his name. By some dude. Lol._**

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Never Meet Again

Three years. Three _years _since I'd left.

_Well, there's one thing  
I'd like to rearrange  
But after everything's already happened  
There's nothing left to change  
_  
I regretted it now. I missed them, missed _her _almost every single day. The only times I could forget was when I was with Anja, but even she was no replacement to Max, to the flock.

And I couldn't go back. Not after so long. I planned on giving it a few months, but then I couldn't find the flock and I had in-depth research in my future for as far as I could see. Me and Anja, scientists, friends, even lovers for awhile there.

_They can take their advice  
And use it all on themselves_

Everyone—all the other research teams—they didn't know my past. They told Anja to stay away from me. When she wouldn't, they said just up and marry me already. They were a bunch of idiots, though.

_Cause when all the talking stops  
I want to have something else_

Anja knew about my wings, why I wanted to be a scientist, about the flock . . . she knew everything. Eventually. And she never said it out loud, but I always sensed something. We both knew I didn't belong there. We knew where I belonged, what I needed.

_I want to have a little faith  
I want to know what a boy and a girl_  
_Can do when they're dizzy  
Cause they're just not spinning with this world_

That was why I was now flying, flying free as I hadn't in months. Last night Anja had finally brought it up, holding back tears, and made me promise that I'd go find them. They—Max, most especially, must've changed by now. She made me promise that I'd fix things with Max.

I couldn't say I really objected. Maybe that's what I needed, was to have the one person keeping me there to just push me, make me go after Max. She and I—we'd been through even more than Anja and I. Anja was just a friend, Max was _part _of me.

Even if we could never forgive each other—well, I had to see what would happen. I couldn't leave it like that, forever.

_Ah, if we never meet again  
If goodbyes remain unspoken_

Anja had slipped off in the middle of the night, after I'd promised, once I was asleep. No goodbyes. I wasn't sure if I'd ever see her again. I fully intended to come back, but with a life like mine plans could change instantly.

_I won't glorify our past  
But our bond remains unbroken  
If we never meet again_

I'd been through so much research, protests, overthrows, everything with Anja. I'd been staying with her, in her one-bedroom apartment, for most of the three years I'd been away from the flock. It wasn't _right_, I know. It was just me trying to forget Max. But even through all that, we'd bonded as friends. Somehow I think she knew we were never more than that.

I had to find the flock now. More importantly, find Max now. But I knew, somehow, that if I did return, if I ever could return, Anja and I—we'd still be friends.

But even in a good mood, cynicism remains. I didn't honestly think I'd ever see her again.

_Well, there's one thing  
That I'll never forget  
_

Invariably after awhile, my thoughts turned themselves around, fully on Max. _Max, Max, Max._

She was . . . she'd been my best friend. I'd been hers. Before everything caved in, we were friends and nearly lovers. I loved her, truly, with all my heart. Always had. We'd always been able to practically read each other's minds. We knew each other so well.

_It's the beauty of a friendship  
That's not over yet_

I could never forget that. Not if I wanted her back. Sure, she'd gone through some stuff, and sure I'd been there to hold her up. Then things had gotten better in every aspect except our relationship, so I'd run.

But if we could just get back to _before _that, only better, then maybe we could rekindle what could never be completely lost.

_I know how just one smile  
Can be planted like a seed  
And I want to do that with somebody else  
The way it was done for me_

The faces of the flock, most especially Max, of course, floated through my mind as I flew. I barely noticed the way the wind coursed around me as I cut right through it. I was tense, uncertain, but I desperately wanted to see them all again.

_I want to have a little faith  
There's something better  
At the end of this path _

I was heading back to where I'd left them. It seemed only right that I start there.

_Cause these memories  
Get old and flat like photographs_

My memory was good. But even that was fading. Three years. Three years of _trying _to forget. That could wear even my memory out. I hadn't forgotten, but I didn't necessarily remember, either.

_Ah, if we never meet again  
If goodbyes remain unspoken_

One memory stood out. The note I'd left, the way each of their sleeping faces looked, the way I'd just flown off with no goodbye, no promise to return. Just gone.

_I won't glorify our past  
But our bond remains unbroken_

That was only one of the things over the years of my youth that I regretted. It was probably the one I regretted the most. I just hoped, right now, hoped as hard as I'd never hoped for anything before, that Max would take me back.

_If we never meet again_

That I'd even be able to freaking _find _her.

_Now there's one thing  
That I don't need to even up  
You can be what they've made you into  
Or you can make your own luck_

After flying for hours on end, I was nearly there. I'd been halfway across the country this morning. That's mutant avian-hybrids for you. Just had to make the best of it.

_But I gotta have faith  
I got to know that a boy and a girl_

I landed in the clearing. I'm not sure if I expected what I saw. I sure didn't expect what I heard. I sat against a tree, listening to a motionless Max as she confessed everything to me, to the wind really because she didn't know I was there. She loved me. I knew she did, but now _she _knew she did, and that had always been the important thing.

_Can still make it even though  
They're just not spinning with this world_

I couldn't believe I'd left her for so long. So many years. My heart ached to run to her, but I couldn't. Not until she was asleep.

Once she was, I knelt next to her, I slipped my jacket over her shivering form. I held her for awhile, until dawn crept over the horizon through the trees. I figured we'd have to stay here at least a few hours, so I went off to get some fuel for a fire, just like I always used to.

_Ah, if we never meet again  
If goodbyes remain unspoken_

She was trying to leave, Max was, when I got back. I stopped her with words.

"You didn't think you could leave without saying hello, did you?"

_I won't glorify our past  
But our bond remains unbroken_

I finally saw her face, worn, weathered, eyes wide, mouth agape, hair falling all over the place. To say she was beautiful would be an understatement. I could still read her face, her eyes. She wasn't quite sure if she could believe I was real.

_If we never meet again  
If goodbyes remain unspoken_

I think she was crying, I don't know. I couldn't tell if it was her sobs or my heart beating as she was pressed against me, clutching my shirt.

_I won't glorify our past  
But our bond remains unbroken_

I found her mouth and kissed her quickly, holding her too me, whispering in her ear, "I'm not leaving again…"

_If we never meet again…_

"Ever."


End file.
